i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
