Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize