Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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