what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
