This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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