This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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