The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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