yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Randomize
