I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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