that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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