What a fucking waste of an outfit
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
