apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
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