weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
