Your tits are I can't wait for
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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