bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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