I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
