is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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