you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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