They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
