I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
