I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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