Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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