We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
