ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
