i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
my liver is dry heaving
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
