1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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