You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
