He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I wish you could order shots online.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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