If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
