Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Randomize