i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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