she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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