Heybabeimwearingurpanties
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Randomize
