Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
