my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
is it fun? or sober?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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