Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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