And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
