I swear she didn't look like that last week.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
