i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
