worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
