call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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