he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
i will never coherently bang her
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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