We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize