On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
