I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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