oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize