It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
