i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
