How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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