sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
