Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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