She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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